A lot of things can turn your brain into a noisy place — fear, stress, trauma, or even your day-to-day activities. And before you catch the drift, you find yourself overthinking about anything and everything. You feel disconnected from yourself and feel like your body is betraying you. Your heart starts racing for no goddamn reason, and suddenly, you question yourself, “Why do I feel so unsafe in my body?”
Does this situation sound familiar? You’re not alone.
Feeling safe in your own body sometimes feels like a distant dream. It happens for a number of reasons, be it an overwhelming moment at the workplace, rocky relationships, or physical discomfort. These feelings get a hold of you when they are least expected, and getting out of them seems almost impossible.
But you know what? You don’t have to stay or feel that way. When you feel yourself getting caught up in the whirlwind of overthinking, tell yourself, “It’s not me, it’s my brain acting up— and I can control it.”
Why You Don’t Feel Safe in Your Body
Before we talk about how to make your nervous system feel safe, let’s understand the difference between a regulated and a dysregulated nervous system.
Do you ever feel like your body’s stress response is out of control? Do you feel overly anxious or even numb and react to routine activities like they’re a do-or-die thing? Trust me, there are a lot of people feeling that way. The feeling that your emotions are running the show instead of you is pretty common. These are some of the symptoms of emotional dysregulation.
Now, why does this happen? Dysregulation means when your nervous system constantly sends distress signals to your brain, making you feel uncomfortable and catastrophic even in minor situations. Rather than feeling safe or at peace, your body shifts into survival mode, trying to shield you from perceived threats — threats that are not actually present. This explains why situations like a small disagreement or the fear of missing a deadline can make you feel as if your whole world is turning upside down.
On the flip side, when your nervous system is regulated, it brings your body back into balance and makes you feel grounded. The regulation allows you to handle everyday stressors — work pressure or personal conflicts — without feeling anxious or overwhelmed. It helps you calm down your nervous system, making you feel safe in your body. You start processing your emotions in a healthy way, making informed decisions, and regaining control. In this state, you create a safe space for yourself and don’t feel the need to run from your feelings. If you are able to do that, that’s when true body healing starts.
Now let’s understand how to make your nervous system feel safe and ultimately, feel safe within yourself regardless of external circumstances and past traumas.
Tips to Regulate Your Nervous System
Let’s explore some of the proven tricks to relax your nervous system and settle down instantly. These powerful techniques work best at managing stress and anxiety from childhood trauma. So, to feel safe within yourself and be able to control your triggers, it is essential to stay open to these tips.
Notice that You Feel Triggered
Easier said than done, right? But when you get triggered by something, notice it and accept it. This will help. As soon as you start heeding what sets off your triggers, you will catch them faster each time than you did before.
The idea? Once you realize that you are triggered or dysregulated, you will become more aware of your emotional and physical imbalances and learn to manage them before they get worse. Don’t be a jumpy cat and start confronting people or making big decisions. Give yourself a break and wait for your nervous system (aka brain) to get stable after you have processed the trigger.
Say What You Feel
Noticed it? Good! Now acknowledge it and say to yourself “Yes, I’m feeling triggered.” You don’t have to specifically tell other people what you are feeling, it’s about you recognizing that something is indeed affecting you.
Simply saying it in your brain will help you differentiate between the triggered part of you and the one that knows how to react in that situation. This will help you get back in gear and give you time to process your thoughts and emotions more effectively.
Make Sure You’re Safe
First things first, stop whatever you are doing and ensure your safety. If you are driving, pull over. If you are a part of a heated conversation, hit the pause. Get into the “I want to continue this, but I need a moment for myself” mode. There is no reason to feel bad doing so, you are giving yourself time to settle down or re-regulate.
Moreover, if you are getting this urge to keep doing whatever you are doing, remind yourself that it’s not you—It’s the trigger talking. In such situations, you must give yourself more time to relax to feel safe in your body.
Breathe Your Way Back
Breathing can take away stress and calm you down. So, take 10-12 slow, deep breaths because they will activate your body’s natural relaxation responses. While this practice is probably a known fact, a quick reminder can be helpful.
Now how to do it! While breathing, push your tongue against the back of your teeth. I mentioned this because it will bring more awareness to your body and locate your sense of presence. It’s an easy technique to reconnect yourself to the central part of the body, bringing a sense of self-awareness back into your body.
Related Article: Breathe Your Way to Better Health: Benefits of Breathwork and How It Works
Sing, Hum, or Whistle
Yes, yes, I know some of you might find it a bit weird but singing and humming help reduce stress, promote calmness, and boost your overall well-being.
Whether it’s belting out your favorite song, singing in the shower, starting your morning with a few minutes of humming, or practicing mindful melodies — all these practical activities can do wonders for your nervous system. Singing, humming, and whistling help you take slower, deeper out-breaths, which shifts your mind into a more relaxed, happier state and power up your spirits.
Grab Some Protein
According to a study, under acute stress conditions, the human body craves carbs and sugary content. But actually, it’s the protein that helps you feel relaxed and grounded. Protein-rich foods stabilize your mood and energy levels and reconnect you with your body.
So, the next time you feel triggered or stressed, treat yourself with nuts, yogurt, or some eggs to help you feel more centered.
Take a Cold Shower
Save this technique if you have a full-blown meltdown — you can get a reset of your brain by taking a cold shower. Now, I’m not saying jump into an icy cold like you’re training for a polar plunge— just that “oh my God” kind of cold that wakes up your nervous system.
Remember, it’s not just a mood lifter, cold water gives you an abundance of energy boost. A cheap, powerful, and an easy technique to get your spirits up.
Nature
I love this one personally. Stressed or not, green spaces work wonders. They have the ability to bring a sense of indescribable calmness— it’s like nature’s own version of a deep breath. According to research, taking a stroll in nature, compared to urban walks, can significantly reduce stress hormone cortisol by 12.4%, sympathetic nerve activity by 7%, and heart rate by approximately 6%.
So, indulge yourself in activities like gardening or bird-watching. And if stepping outside is not feasible, looking out the window can still help. The idea is to connect with nature and find your inner self. These activities will not just decrease your anxiety and stress but also help you feel safe in your body.
Final Thoughts
With these techniques, you are ready to tackle any emotional trigger that comes your way — be it the loss of a job, the death of a loved one, or as little as getting a parking ticket or the nervousness before a Zoom interview. Having these tips at your fingertips can help you get back on track and feel safe in the world around you.
The sooner you acknowledge your triggers, the faster you can overlook the things that set them off, and you can quickly regain your footing. As a result, you can use your focus on other important things. Once you get a hang of it, life will be easier and freer for you, and you can make decisions confidently. That’s when you can truly feel safe in your body.
Never forget that healing is very much possible. The only thing is going in the right direction.
In the end, I’d like to add a question for you. If you were good at re-regulating your nervous system, what difference it would have made in your life?
FAQs
What are the signs that show that my body is experiencing dysregulation?
Signs of dysregulation vary from person to person. Some may feel heightened anxiety, racing heart, or feeling overwhelmed even with daily tasks, while others may feel disconnected from their bodies or undergo emotional breakdown. If any of these signs fit your situation, use the above-mentioned techniques to feel more grounded.
How can I create a safe space for myself when I feel dysregulated or triggered?
As mentioned in the post, the first step to creating a safe space is to notice your triggers and accept them. Try to remove yourself from the situation and practice grounding techniques like deep breathing, humming, or start doing activities that you love. This could include gardening, listening to your favorite singer, meditation, or simply taking a stroll in nature. All these techniques can help revitalize a sense of safety in your body.
Does nutrition play any role in feeling safe in my body?
Indeed, and a very significant one! Foods packed in omega-3 fatty acids (fish, chia seeds, flax seeds, etc.) have been linked to reducing stress levels. Protein-rich items help balance blood sugar levels, regulate emotions, and reduce cravings for sugary food, improving mental health and overall well-being.
How can I feel safe in my body by practicing mindfulness?
Mindfulness is the process of paying attention to the present without judgment. Techniques include mindful breathing, meditation, or a body scan in order to reconnect with your body and emotions.
For example, during a body scan, you systematically pay attention to different parts of your body, acknowledging any tension or discomfort. This practice can help you cultivate awareness and promote a sense of safety, making it easier to manage stress and anxiety.
References:
Thompson Ross A., “Emotion dysregulation: A theme in search of definition”, https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/31030684/
Sheppes Gal, Suri James, and Gross James J., “Emotion regulation and psychopathology” https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/25581242/
Lemmens Sofia G., Born Jurriaan M., Martens Eveline A., and Martens Mieke J. “Influence of Consumption of a High-Protein vs. High-Carbohydrate Meal on the Physiological Cortisol and Psychological Mood Response in Men and Women”, https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3033415/#:~:text=Firk%20et%20al.%20[20]%20showed%20that%20intake,dampened%20the%20cortisol%20response%20to%20acute%20stress
Park Bum Jin, Tsunetsugu Yuko, Kasetani Tamami, Kagawa Takahide, and Miyazaki Yoshifumi. “The physiological effects of Shinrin-yoku (taking in the forest atmosphere or forest bathing): evidence from field experiments in 24 forests across Japan”, https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2793346/
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